David Doesn't Do Dallas

Following up on the 'Becks' post earlier.....he's not coming now. Too injured to play, so the L.A. Galaxy isn't bringing him at all.

Just saw a poll in the Dallas newspaper (non-scientific, yes) where 65% of the respondees said now that Becks is not going to be there, neither are they. Wow. Those are some dedicated soccer fans, huh?

I think that's pretty lousy all the way around. The Galaxy should at least bring the guy, for all these idiots who only bought tickets to see him. At least they could watch him standing on the sidelines, and that might be enough to get people to show up. If I were FC Dallas, I'd probably be a little ticked right about now, as are many fair-weather fans, no doubt.

Vanity and Insanity

Giselle Bundchen made $33 million last year as a 'supermodel'.

Why do the least important jobs get paid the most amount of money?

If Giselle hadn't appeared in a single ad last year, would any of us have been the worse off for it?

Nothing against Giselle personally, but society's priorities have gone completely wonky. And this is yet one more glaring example of that.

Cruise Control

Though I happen to think Katie Holmes' new do is an improvement over the too-long little girl locks she sported forever, has anyone else noticed that she, Tom and Suri now have the same haircut? As if the 'cult' rumors weren't enough, now they all physically look alike, too.

Actually, I've never been able to decide which one of them Suri looks like, because to me, Tom and Katie look just like each other. They could be siblings, which brings an even odder dynamic to the whole scene. And now it's even scarier with the interchangeable haircuts. *shudder*

Much Ado About Becks, For Naught

For months now, there's been a billboard on the Dallas North Tollway trying to get us all excited about the forthcoming visit of the L.A. Galaxy (starring David Beckham), for a soccer match against FC Dallas later this week. I don't know how many tickets usually sell for these things....hard to tell how popular soccer is here among anyone older than age 10....but I did hear that as of last week, 1000 tickets were still left for the Beckham extravaganza. That's probably pretty good for a city enamored with the NFL and Dallas Cowboys, where soccer is generally viewed as something played by school children.

I just read in this morning's news, however, that because of Beckham's latest ankle injury, he may not even travel to Dallas this week at all. In fact, the Galaxy coaches will make the call on his status later today after their practice. So after months of hoopla and boosting ticket sales for this game, it looks like Becks may not even show, and if he does, it's unlikely that he'll take the field for any meaningful period of time.

In an ironic note, I did read, that despite the nagging ankle injury, Becks did manage to amply hit the dance floor at his All-Star A-list celebrity party the other night in L.A.. I wonder if there were 1000 remaining tickets for that. Not likely.

Should We Seek Fat-Free Friends?

A recent study has concluded that the people you hang out with have a greater impact than your genes in determining whether you're overweight or not. Really?

In looking around at who I 'hang out with', the study's conclusion seems to have some merit. Most of my friends are on the leaner side and in pretty good shape, and despite the occasional splurges, everyone exercises and watches what they eat.

I do wonder about cause and effect, though. Are we leaner because we hang out together? Or do we hang out together because we're leaner -- a by-product of having common interest in nutrition, fitness and weight-consciousness? Or is it all just happenstance, and I just happen to randomly be in a leaner group?

Now that I think about it, it does strike me that I have very few....if any...overweight friends. In fact, I can't really think of any. Must be a reason for this.

Out of the Blue

While recovering on the sofa on Monday afternoon, in an entertainment void, I watched -- well, sort of watched -- 'Into the Blue'. It wanted to be a modern-day version of "The Deep" (starring iconic beauty, Jacqueline Bisset) but it wasn't. It was a terrible movie. I often wonder who puts up the money for these things. Nevertheless, I watched off and on until it became unbearable. Somewhere along the line, I stopped listening to what passed for dialogue and just enjoyed the beautiful scenery -- Bahamian waters, beaches and Paul Walker.

Why isn't he a bigger star? He's a good looking dude with a decent amount of screen charisma, and it was almost like watching a new art form as he moved through the ocean on his dives. With those piercing blue eyes and chiseled mug, why do we not see him in more films? Who is managing this guy's career?

Also, while I'm not a Jessica Alba fan....(does anyone really consider her to be a serious actress?).....I must say she looked pretty good running around in her tiny bikinis. It was a good role for her -- she should stick to those deep, complicated characters. :)

I'm always amazed that she gets labeled as a fashion icon. That's telltale about the state of fashion these days. While she's a pretty little girl, she strikes me as exactly that -- a little girl. When she dresses up, to me, she looks like a child playing in her mommy's clothing. Fashion icon? Paleez.....

Perv Alert!!

MySpace: 29,000 sex offenders in the member base. And those are the ones they KNOW about.

Ewwwww!!!!

Angels Among Us

In my ongoing 'mission' as an 'observationist' on this planet, I try to step back and notice as much as possible, even when the situation might not be optimal to take in all the details. Case in point: My recent trip to the ER on Sunday.

Now I must admit that I was a bit alarmed when, based on my symptoms, my OBGYN instructed me to go to the hospital emergency room and to possibly prepare for surgery. That sort of news over the phone on a lazy Sunday morning can be a bit disconcerting. But I immediately agreed with her and bolted for the door as quickly as I could. This didn't seem to be something to dawdle over.

In the midst of the slightly panicked state (all day, by the way...waiting for surgery), there was something in my surroundings that stood out for me - something very positive: People.

I had every flavor of medical personnel in and out of my room all day long -- doctors, nurses, orderlies, people taking blood, bringing me blankets, taking my vitals, bringing me ice chips. All day long. And everyone was so nice and caring. It got me to start thinking about people who make their living caring about other people. Amazing, really.

I thought about what it must take for them to get up every day, work long hours, care for sick strangers all day and night, deal with emotions, bodily functions, other people's baggage...and still smile and offer a kind word. That's a real gift. Those people are truly angels among us. And I don't think you can really appreciate them until you are the one laying on the gurney.

There were the OR nurses -- large, portly women who would be considered relatively unattractive by shallow standards, yet they smiled and lightly chatted with me on my way into the OR, and their inner beauty radiated. And the anesthesiologist who smiled and joked with me before 'making me sleepy'....the last person I'd see on this planet, if anything happened. And the sweet nurse who kept bringing me ice chips because they would not let me drink water, and she knew I hadn't had a drop of anything all day. All angels among us, every one of them.

Though they will never read this, I'd like to offer my gratitude to all the people who poked and prodded on me on Sunday...not only for their trained talents, but more for their attitudes and the comfort they offered. I was truly amazed, in awe and thankful.

And I actually feel grateful for the experience, because I walked away with a humble, positive feeling from it. The people made the difference, hands down.

How Not to Spend a Sunday

I haven't talked about this on my blog, but ever since the miscarriage, I've continued to have physical complications from it. I've always been very healthy, so it's been a real surprise at how much difficulty I've encountered with all this. It just didn't seem to want to straighten itself out, no matter what I did.

I thought things were back on track until a few days ago, when they veered way off course. On Sunday morning, it landed me in a nearby hospital emergency room and ultimately, an operating room. Surgery. Not exactly how I'd planned to spend my Sunday, and I can't say I'd recommend it.

But I'm home now, feeling better and hoping for the best. I was glad I was back in Dallas with my OBGYN. I'm a little dinged out today but hopefully on the mend. It's been a long haul and very frustrating. It needs to be over with, because I simply can't be bothered -- too much to do, too many places to be, too many other things to think about. I can't be bogged down with a lingering health issue.

Onward.

Texas Bound

We've had a few things come up that need our attention in Texas, so we are jetting back to Big D tomorrow evening. Really hate to leave the beach and the gorgeous weather in Florida, but duty calls. Hopefully, we'll return soon. I'm guessing the beach will still be here when we return. Bon voyage.

Indecent Exposure

Here's a problem you don't have every day: I'm in my friend's television commercial, and I hate it.

Some background: Friends who run their own business hooked up with a television production company to film a commercial that will run sporadically on cable channels nationally. They approached my husband and I to be in it, as customer testimonials.

Now I balked from the very start. While I'm flattered that they view us as some of their more 'attractive' friends and wanted us to be in their commercial, I just don't like those sorts of things. I don't want to be in any spotlights and prefer to be behind the scenes. I cannot tell you why...that's just me. If I were an actor, I'd be one of those people who never watches their own work. I feel exposed, and it makes me uncomfortable.

Nevertheless, to spare their feelings, we agreed to be in the commercial. We just saw a pre-final cut of it yesterday, and it's genuinely awful...really bad. And that's not even our part (which turns out to be the least offensive of the lot). It's the whole thing...it's just bad.

So now, we're in this really awful commercial, and it's going to run on national television, and I hope to God no one I know sees it.

My friends asked us for suggestions on final edit. My husband fears that the one we asked for will hurt their feelings. I wanted them to use our first names only....no surnames. Besides it being unneccessary to use them, no one ever asked our permission, and I had no idea they would plaster our names across the screen. That's just a little too much exposure for me. Someone may recognize my face but won't be sure it's me, unless of course my name is also in their face. So, please, remove it. It's not necessary. My husband thinks we probably hurt their feelings by asking for that, but I pointed out that by now, they know I don't like exposure, so it's in line with my general views, and not a commentary on the commercial itself.

So my initial instinct to not appear in this thing was spot on. Now I'm on TV...bad TV. I'm going to be the idiot on bad TV that some boxer-adorned insomniac is watching while eating leftover Chinese noodles in front of the TV in the the middle of the night. Lovely. Just lovely.

They Flunked

Re: Job Interview Panic

Well that didn't take long. Had a short preliminary discussion with the folks looking for a writer. It didn't take long for me to X them off the list. They failed the interview almost immediately.

The reason? I don't want to drive 40 minutes to an office every day. I realize that sounds petty, because most people do that, and I did that myself for a lot of years. But for the last 5+ years, I did not. I home officed and went to a company office only as necessary. And now, that's a must for me. I need to be able to work virtually because I refuse to spend an hour and a half a day in traffic again. Nope, just won't do it. Only for the most fabulous job on the planet where fame and fortune are guaranteed. Maybe.

It's part of my balance of life mission. I just refuse to sit in traffic, burn gas at $3 a gallon and become yet another road rager out there. Not if I don't have to. And in the age of the internet, where locations matter not, I shouldn't have to.

Onward.

Commitment Phobia

In the past year plus of being on 'sabbatical' from the work-a-day world, I've come to realize what a commitment phobe I am. I don't want to commit to a permanent place to live or commit my time to someone else's mission (as in work) or even commit to watching a television show that is more than half an hour. It's really bad, and the hard part is, when I do commit to something and get into it, I generally get some real satisfaction from it. But the fear of commitment keeps me from jumping in...hence a constant dilemma.

The latest manifestation of commitment phobia popped up yesterday. Recently, I was perusing some job postings online, just to see what was out there these days, and I saw one looking for a writer in the area of Advertising, Marketing and Public Relations. The job description sounded like it could be fun, given the right environment, and since one can only tell so much from a written job posting, I decided to send in my resume and a letter to find out more about it.

Ten days later, last night, my phone rang. They want me to come in for an interview. Yikes! I don't know any more about it than I did when I sent the resume, but my commitment phobia is kicking in, and my blood pressure is going up, already. I am like one of Pavlov's dogs. Someone says 'job', and I start to panic.

Dilemma! Do I want to go to work again? Do I want to commit my time to someone else? Could it be the start of a whole new career in writing? After all, that is certainly a change from what I was doing for 20 years that made me so sour on corporate life. Could this be something where I could actually work and find balance of life?

I realize that my fear of commitment stems from my other primary flaw of being a control freak. I fear committment because I know once I commit, something will suck me in and take over my life because I will want to control every aspect of it in order to produce 'perfect' results. And I just don't want that to happen again. If I could do something productive and satisfying, while finding balance in life, that would be the ultimate. But for me, I wonder if that's possible.

Dim Bulbs

Yesterday, I caught this headline (but did not bother to read the article):

'Sienna Miller Urges Energy Conservation'

First of all, why is this news?

And secondly, with 'experts' like this publicly campaigning for the cause, is it any wonder that people don't take it seriously?

Next Stop, Mumu

Went shopping with a friend on Saturday, and though we had not planned it, we ended up at a swimsuit sale. Trying on swimsuits in department store dressing rooms is generally a fate worse than death, however, this was a half price sale, so we couldn't resist. Like brave soldiers, we faced the ghastly lighting and mirrors in the dressing rooms and fearlessly tried on bikinis -- GASP!!

Now, I'm not a youngster ...and I generally refuse to appear in public in anything but a stylish one-piece suit, unless I am among complete strangers who I know I will never see again. It's not that I look all that horrible -- for my age -- but I am a little self-conscious of people I actually know walking away with that mental image on their hard drives. I'd just rather not do it.

BUT for some reason - I think I was egged on by my spotlight-seeking friend -- I engaged in the bikini-fest and ended up purchasing a couple of them for use in my own backyard or in other appropriate (for me) settings. I came home and tried them on for my husband, who loved them and said he felt I shouldn't be so shy about wearing them, as he thought I looked better than most in them. (yes, he's a doll.)

SOOOO....the next day, we were invited to the regular beach gathering at the home of friends (who I've mentioned before). They are the loveliest people...South African...and a little less prudish about beach wardrobe than I. Regardless of their ages, body shapes, tan lines, etc., most of the women wear bikinis in order to maximize the tan impact, and they're always after me to wear one....because WHO CARES? Right?

So, okay....between their urging and the support of my husband, I decided to don one of the bikinis for yesterday's beach gathering. I decided to do it, 40-yr old body and all. What the hell.

I selected the least offensive/most coverage suit of the bunch, put it on, threw on a cover-up and went over there. Sure enough, the gang was all there in their bikinis -- thin, fat, short, tall, tan, white, you name it. No worries. I felt I would fit right in.

Then, as I slipped off the cover-up and got comfortable on my lounge chair.....I spotted a new female attendee coming out of the pool. Hmmm...she was new...hadn't seen her before. And my goodness...didn't she have the perfect bod in that teeny weeny yellow polka dot bikini (literally)! Based on that, I wanted to throw not only my cover-up back on, but also anything else that might immediately erase my presence from the scene.

And then I found out -- wouldn't you know it -- that yes, she was new to the crowd....a friend of a guest who had not attended before. And oh, by the way, she was on the cover of Playboy magazine not long ago and featured in several issues....among other things. Geez.... could it get worse?

So...see what happens? You talk yourself into being vulnerable to the world with your 40-yr old body in a bikini, baring almost all....and then a Playboy model emerges from your pool, and you just want to drown yourself.

Next time I'm wearing a mumu.

By the way, that's her in the picture above. Not that I would trade to look like her (body by Dow Corning, hair by Clorox), but she can certainly make a 40-yr old feel wholly inadequate in a bikini.

Oh, well. I guess there are worse things. :)

Two There, None Here

While walking the dog last night, my husband ran into some neighbors who live around the block. They're a young, cute couple who are the parents of a big flopsy mopsy white labrador retriever, whose feet have always been bigger than him, whose sweet face and eyes make you melt as he falls all over himself to move in for a pat on the head. He's adorable...a real-life Pixar animated character on four paws.

But tonight, my neighbors had some new news. They are expecting twins....in November. It seems like carrying twins would be quite the task for such a tiny little girl, but she's doing it. Congrats to them all.

But....I couldn't help but think....I couldn't keep my mind from going there. Maybe I was just tired or having a down day.... But I couldn't help but think that life is certainly unfair and sometimes even cruel. Come November, there will be two babies at their house and none at ours.

She's the first person I've run into who is due at the same time I was, and that piece of news really hit a tender spot. I'm not looking forward to November, as I feel it will be a down month for me. While I'm happy for them, I can't help but feeling sad for us.

But life goes on.

The Merits of 'Fine, thank you'.

Have you ever wondered when one becomes officially "old"? I think I have it figured out. It's when someone asks how you're doing, and you actually tell them....in gory detail.

Yesterday, we had lunch with some older relatives, and they spent about 80% of the conversation talking about their ailments, medications, doctors visits and medical tests.

Now I understand, this is a huge part of their lives at this point, and I really do not want to be insensitive to that. But as I sat and listened to this conversation, I marveled at how people who used to be able to have fairly well-rounded conversation were now so focused on names and purposes of specific medications, their generic versions, dosages, and potential side effects of them all. They also had no shyness in endlessly discussing all the medical tests and their results. I really don't wish to be that familiar with a colonoscopy procedure until I have to go do one myself. I'll pass on the details, especially during lunch.

I wondered -- sooner or later, does it all come to this? Is this what we have to look forward to? I shudder to think.

As I get older (God willing), I am going to try very hard to not slip into that mode of spending entire conversations focused on aches, pains, and pills. When someone asks 'How are you?', I'm going to try very hard to smile and say 'fine, thank you'.

Puff Mama

I am starting to see this puffed sleeve "fashion trend" everywhere. And I hate it. I think anyone over the age of 18 looks pretty silly in it, and I'm seeing grown women -- actresses, anchor women, attorneys, politicians and others wearing it. They look ridiculous.

I hope it passes into the bargain bin quickly.

Hogwarts & Cheap Tarts

Sienna Miller and Daniel Radcliffe have been on my TV every time I've turned it on in the last 24 hours. Early morning to late night. Every talk show on the planet. They must be exhausted...I know I'm tired of seeing them. At least Sienna managed to not drop the 'F' bomb again, although perhaps she did, and they censored her. Such a lady.

I did notice that she was wearing a significant amount of make-up, and she actually looks better all caked up.

She said her new clothing line '2812' is due out soon in Neiman Marcus and Bergdorf Goodman shortly. Funny that such a cheap tart managed to rank so high dollar with a fashion line. Go figure. More overpriced junk that I won't be buying.

The double standard is alive and well.

Seems Los Angeles' mayor (married, 2 kids) has been publicly caught having an affair with a female news anchor from the largest Spanish TV network covering L.A. City Hall. He's been caught, red-handed, full public confession after, of course, denying it all.

So what's happened? The female news anchor has been put on leave by Telemundo while they investigate whether or not the affair breached journalistic standards.

And the mayor? Oh, he publicly apologized, but he continues to go to work every day, like nothing is amiss.

What happened to the good ole days, when public people who were caught doing bad things had the decency to resign and go away?

And why is it always the woman in these situations who gets the hammer? Why shouldn't the mayor - public leader, older and wiser, would-be role model -- be reprimanded in some way?

The legacy of Bill Clinton lives on.

Oh, yeah, and the mayor's a Democrat, so the press is giving him a pass. If he'd been a Republican, he'd been drawn and quartered by now. And he probably would have resigned in shame.

Double standards indeed.

A Control Freak on Acid

As posted earlier, I had my visit with Eva the Diva today. Interesting.

As you may recall, Eva is the 'healer' masseuse with her own small clinic, full of potions and treatments that would make a witch doctor envious....all provided in a positive spiritual light, of course.

First, I had the personalized massage. The session began with Eva dangling a crystal on a thread over my mid-section, where it seemed to twirl in a consistent circle on its own. She held it there for about a minute and then declared that my energy is very good, which is an improvement from the last time I saw her, when it was apparently a bit lackluster. Actually, I've been feeling pretty good lately, very energetic and up, so maybe there's something to that afterall.

Next, she began the massage, working on my arms and hands. She asked me what I'd been doing to make my hands 'constrained'. I told her I'd played golf yesterday, and today, they're a little stiff. So she definitely picked up on that.

She moved to my legs, ankles and feet and declared that I had some energy blockage in my lower calves, which she attributed to acidity. According to her, stress, anger and frustration generate acids; acids tear down the body, causing energy blockages and accelerated onset of aging. So the key is to avoid acidity and to keep your body in a balanced PH state. Alkalines are good and are associated with spiritual and physical bliss; Acids are the enemy.

I flipped over and she worked on my back. She declared that my left side, which she says is the 'spiritual' side, was in great condition -- no stress, relaxed, an easy massage. The right side, however, was a mess. The right side is, among other things, the 'control' side. It feels the impact of our ego, our mind and our desire to control things. I'm an admitted control freak, and it showed up in a stressed out, twisted mess. She worked a very long time to get it to loosen up and told me that I needed to learn to 'let things go' more easily.

She also said the right side is the 'feminine side', and that mine was feeling the impact of a stressful event -- something had happened to me...there was a change that had come about in my life that ultimately didn't play out, and I was holding on to the stress of that. (Hello? Miscarriage? Perhaps...and I didn't tell her a thing about that...)

She also hit a spot above my right hip that was incredibly sore. The odd thing is that I was not aware that it was sore until she found it. I had no idea. I asked her how that could be. She said it's because I am having issues 'moving forward', and the impact is being felt in my right hip, but I am subconsciously blocking it out. Hmmm....a reference to my career issues of late? Perhaps. Eva says the spirit, emotions and physical are all tied together, and if one is out of kilter, it shows up in the others. She may be spot on with that one. It was incredibly sore, and I didn't even know it.

Interesting stuff. I am determined to work on the 'letting things go' concept, to promote positive energy flow and keep my spirit, emotions and body more in sync. Apparently, that's the key to it all.

Sex & the Cinema

I've just read that there is now a 'Sex and the City' movie in the works.

I have mixed feelings about this.

On the one hand, I miss the girls greatly...mostly on a Friday night when TV generally sucks, and I'd like to snuggle up with my man, a pizza, a bottle of wine and Carrie, Miranda, Samantha and Charlotte. (I do miss those nights!)

On the other hand, the series ended on a good note -- everyone was with someone and happy. Miranda was with Steve, Samantha was with her boy-toy model, Charlotte had married the bald lawyer, and finally and most importantly, Carrie was back with Big. Oh, and we also learned that his real name is 'John'. Finally.

So WHAT are they going to do with this story in a movie? If they break up Big and Carrie one more time, I'm just going to scream. It took us 7 or 8 years to get them together and send them off into 'happily ever after', and if they screw that up with a new script, I'm going to just absolutely throw an official hissy fit...an especially loud and ugly one. SATC WRITERS: DON'T DO IT. YOU'VE BEEN WARNED.

Please, please....just leave well enough alone.

Happy 4th!!

Assuming the weather holds and we can get a tee time, we're off to the golf course for another round. Happy 4th of July everyone!

Pondering the 4th

Tomorrow is the 4th of July, U.S. Independence Day. WHOO-HOO!! While I'm in the mood for a hearty celebration, we don't have any major plans. It seems like we never do, even though every year, we vow to do something special.

On the one hand, I'm frustrated that another 4th has come, and we didn't get off our duffs yet again. On the other hand, considering airport security issues and gas prices, I'm sort of glad we didn't. We thought about maybe hopping over to the Bahamas for a few days or going down to Miami's South Beach and booking a cool hotel on the beach, or driving down to Key West for a few days, but we opted to do none of those things, for various reasons.

So tomorrow, it looks like we'll either play a round of golf - I can always use the practice and am really enjoying playing lately - OR we'll go on a long bike ride up the beach road to Palm Beach and back, which could take up the better part of the day. Then we'll go watch fireworks from the pier over the Intracoastal waterway that's within walking distance of the house.

Our other choice for fireworks is to go downtown locally, where the city is having a huge street celebration. But I must admit, I'm a bit of a snob when it comes to things like that -- I try to avoid anything that's "free", as it generally draws the dreggs of the Earth to it. I learned this a long time ago with "free" concerts and don't attend those anymore either. Yuck.

Interesting -- I just read about some archived documents kept in the Smithsonian, which will soon be on display for public view. One was Jefferson's original "rough draft" of the Declaration of Independence, complete with scratched out words and sentence re-writes. Interesting to see what they were considering and what got left in and taken out. Perhaps just a little more insight into some brilliant minds. I wonder how they'd feel about how things are going these days...probably pretty proud in general, as this was a huge social experiment, and no one knew if it would catch on. I'd say it has caught on pretty well, and it's really pretty good, warts and all. I'll take it.

Happy 4th!!

My Little Oasis

My latest project has been creating a backyard oasis at the Florida house. Drew up some plans with a landscape architect -- patio pavers, tropical plants, Italian fountain, the feeling of a Mediterranean courtyard. Then I added patio furniture, an outdoor rug and a few flower pots (not in the photo), and here are the results. Always a work in progress, but it's almost time for a party on the patio. Add some sangria, a little music, a few choice guests, and we're done!