Let it Rain

Rain, rain, rain....the rain came down all day today. I don't think there was a moment when it stopped. It quietly, evenly poured every minute. But I didn't really mind. It kept me indoors turning attention to things that needed it like cleaning the house, doing the laundry and packing for my trip to Toronto next week.

My husband wasn't here today, so I did 'girl' things. Post-cleaning and laundry, I got online and wardrobe shopped. But instead of buying online, I went shopping in my own closet. I found an outfit online that I really liked, then went searching in my own closet to recreate it. And I did pretty well actually. May have even saved a few hundred dollars by mixing and matching things I don't normally wear together. The addition of an odd accessory here or there, and viola -- a new look.

All this while watching a 'Sex and the City' marathon, which prompted me to be even more 'wardrobe-creative'. I never get tired of watching Carrie and the girls. It's like visiting old friends.

Tonight? Feels like it's time for a home spa session. I see a white terry robe, a leisurely bath, a facial, a sappy paperback and a glass of Conundrum all in my near future. Not the most exciting of evenings, but indulgent and soul-nourishing, nonetheless. Sometimes a girl needs an indulgent night alone.

Fleeting, but Forever

We beheld the spectacle again this weekend of yet another Kennedy funeral. Uncle Teddy this time.

This country is fascinated by the Kennedy clan. They bring the epic story of an American family. Such wealth, such charisma, so much tragedy, all out in public. They're as close to a royal family as we'll ever see here. And with the passing of Teddy, I believe it is all gone now. The Kennedy mystique has been laid to rest.

We all watched this weekend as the family gathered -- children and grandchildren of the famous, classic faces we've all come to know. And in the faces of the grandchildren, we look for the next one, the next Kennedy to carry on, the one who has the style and mystique. Sadly, we don't see it. If it's there, it isn't obvious. It's so interesting how the aura of Kennedy does not necessarily transfer with the mere bestowing of the name and the genes.

I couldn't help but watch Caroline Kennedy - the last of the most famous of the Kennedy families, now the lone child, the lone sibling left to carry the standard for the name. But you know what? She doesn't have it either. She's probably the only one in that small but signficant Kennedy family unit that doesn't. Who can hold a candle to the style and mystique of Jack and Jackie? John Jr. had it, but sadly, he's also gone now.

In a way, I feel sorry for Caroline. Her mother was an icon that made in indelible impact on the world. To this day, her style is studied and revered. Yet Caroline doesn't seem to have any of that. Candidly, she's frumpy, something Jackie could never be. I wonder how much that has bothered her over the years, if at all.

I ran across this photo of Jackie, Rose and John Jr. during a stay at their Palm Beach home. Even on a weekend, headed for church, Jackie's style still fascinates. It is pure classic. And we won't see the likes of it again, not from Caroline nor from any remaining Kennedy. It was fleeting, yet etched in our minds forever.

Everything Old is New Again

Sometimes I find myself relying too much on external entertainment and not enough on creativity. It's easier to find amusement with something new and interesting....a new toy....than it is to learn to better explore and enjoy the things we currently have in our midst.

So today, I declared a new goal -- to explore and appreciate what I have now. To find new ways, new approaches to old, familiar things in my life. To take the mundane and try to make a different experience out of it. Simple things. Easy things. Everyday things.

For example....with just my husband and I at home, we often slip into the bad habit around dinnertime of loading up a plate and parking in front of the television while we eat. We walk by a beautiful dining table beneath a lovely, dimming light fixture that could change the whole dynamic of dinner, and we don't even think about it. We never consider how much better the dinner experience could be if we just changed it up a bit.

So tonight.....no more eating in front of the TV. Tonight, I set the dining table and called my husband to it, told him it was time for dinner. I dimmed the light, poured the wine, and we enjoyed each other and the setting. It made dinner a whole different experience. And I realize we won't be able to do this every night, but I think we should aim to do that more often than not.

Storm Central

2009 has brought us a very quiet hurricane season so far. June....nothing....July, not even a tropical wave....August begins, all quiet. Then suddenly, mid-August, up pop two or three storms, all wandering into our path.

The good news? As quickly as they wandered onto our track, they wobbled right off of it. Tropical Storm Ana is headed west of us, and Hurricane Bill appears to be off to Bermuda....assuming the computer models are right.

Such is hurricane season. When you live on the coast, we just call it summer.

Yes, There is Intelligent Life Outside of the Beltway

I am worried about the redistribution of wealth, and I'm now even more concerned about redistribution of health. But I have the greatest concern that those of us who are voicing our concern and dissent to government-run healthcare are being cast aside as 'extremists' and part of far right-wing organized efforts.

Couldn't it be that regular people, on their own, simply oppose having the government run everything? Maybe some of us want the government out of our lives rather than in charge of our lives. Does that make us extremists? Just because we don't live in D.C. or New York City or L.A. or Chicago, does that mean we don't have a brain in our heads and a right to a voice?

One obvious and constant flaw I've seen in the Obama administration is the inability to take criticism or deal with disagreement. It's an elitist viewpoint that he, not we, knows what's best for us, and that regular people, despite what we say, couldn't possibly be intelligent enough to manage our own lives. This really scares me about our current government. It seeks to control our lives and crush dissent and feels like a Marxist state now more than ever.

Surely, the pendulum will swing back the other direction soon; I just hope it's in time to keep everything from being destroyed.

Worth It

Today? Lazy day, slouching around.

Yesterday? Spent half the day cycling, the other half playing golf.

Yesterday is the reason I'll be a puddle today -- worn out and sunburned. But, it was well worth it. Yesterday was fabulous!

Unhappy Anniversary

Today is the 2-yr anniversary of the terrible thing that happened to us. We're moving into Year 3 of it now.

Without going into what it is, I cannot tell you the angst that it causes in your life. Everything stops. Everything stands still. It all goes on hold until it's over. And you don't know when it's going to be over. So for two years, now beginning three, we cannot plan a thing in our lives. We've simply been living day to day without the ability to move forward on anything. Can't plan a vacation, a purchase, a job change, nothing. Can't look forward over the horizon to imagine what my life will be like in 5 years. Can't be aggressive, can't invest, can't do anything. We have to sit here in silence and suffer through it, and who knows for how long.

Life has handed us something that most people never have to go through. I am finding out things that I never thought were possible. And you'd never believe it, if I tried to tell you. You'd have to go through it yourself to really believe the things they can do to you. My whole view of the world has been skewed. It's the ultimate nightmare, a bad movie indeed.

At the end of all this (whenever that is), I'm tempted to write a book. But probably not, because mostly, I just want to move on and forget about it. The real hell is the process. The process alone ruins your life.

Just Add Water

Palm trees make everything better.

And the ocean, the salt-water smell of the beach, especially at night. It makes things better.

When I come back to the ocean, I am reminded that this is where I belong. I grew up 15 minutes from a beach, and I forever have a kinship with it. I must have salt water in my veins.

Recipe for a better, calmer life -- Add water. Stir.

Hiding in Plain Sight

This has not been very good week. It may not have been any worse than any other week in reality, but it feels like it has been, and that's what matters.

I go to the Florida house this Friday after months of not being there. I have to get it together before the Florida friends sense something's not right with me. Most of them are having their own horrific problems, so they probably will not notice mine. It's easy to hide them in plain sight.

I continue to be alone in a crowd. People look at me, but they don't really see me. I won't let them.

Miracle on Front Street

I am blessed.

Yesterday, I was witness to an honest-to-God miracle.

There is no other explanation to this but the awesome power of God.

I watched Him reach out and change lives yesterday, including mine.

I am humbled.